being aaron, being rylie, letters

letters to rylie || dance with daddy

Dear Rylie,

From your perspective, you saw Mommy and Daddy dancing in the dining room and didn’t want to feel left out.
From your perspective, it looked fun.
From your perspective, it was just something that made you laugh.
From your perspective, it was just Daddy doing something silly with you.

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But from my perspective, I saw a little girl with dirty-blond hair and hand-me-down PJ’s from the ’90s who wanted to dance with her daddy because she loves him and doing things with him brings her joy.
I saw a man swaying back and forth while humming a made-up song while a little girl with dirty-blond hair giggled so much she couldn’t stop.

I saw arms being waved all over, big smiles and a dirty-blond ponytail bouncing.

I also saw a moment that one day is going to be bittersweet. A day where your hair will probably be darker, you’ll wear a white dress and be surrounded by family and your best friends. Your sister will probably be your maid of honor, I’ll probably sit in the front row, and you’ll look like an angel floating down the aisle. Your daddy will say he gives you away to belong to another man, and I’ll probably choke back tears as I witness this beautiful exchange. You’ll hold hands with a man who is everything we prayed for and more. He’ll take your hands and you’ll take his name. Later that day, there will be traditional dances, and your daddy will walk out and you’ll dance to a song you two decide on. It’ll be such a sweet, tender, precious moment of a not so little girl dancing with a little older daddy. I’ll probably cry because 18+ years of memories will flood my mind like a highlight reel. Showcasing the most valuable, hilarious, memorable moments that marked our lives with you as a Shaver. You’ll be beautiful, he’ll be handsome, and I’ll be holding your sister’s hand with a big smile and happy-tear running down my cheek.

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Giggles from a little voice-box bring me back and I smile big at the happiness I see in a little girl’s face. A 2-year-old who, from her perspective, was just doing something silly with her daddy. But from my perspective, thrust me into the future where my oldest daughter will bring us a new family member, she’ll have a new name, and she’ll have a lot of pictures of a very special dance with her daddy.

And I’ll be asking everyone for a box of tissues!

Xo,
-Mama

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