Nursing is a part of motherhood I never expected to be difficult. God designed our bodies to grow another human being, that in and of itself is absolutely incredible to me. I was made to do that. So I just assumed nursing would come naturally and easily. Ha. Yeah right!
Rylie made me a mom, and with that new job title came a lot responsibilities – some I knew of and others I did not. One of the responsibilities I did not know about was in order to nurse I had to take care of myself. Drink LOADS of water, eat full meals, etc. So when I took her to a doctor appointment at 3-months and they told me she was under weight and I needed to supplement, it didn’t take long for my supply to disappear altogether. I remember feeling like I had failed her, but I also was happy to see her full and growing.
I was determined to have a different experience with Emmaline, however we had to make the switch while she was 3-months-old too because she ate so much and my work schedule would not let me take the necessary time to pump and boost my supply. I definitely felt like a failure then – but God was kind and assured me it was okay to “accept the gift of formula.”
I was confident round 3 with Paisley was going to be a success. I pumped multiple times at night (even though Paisley was sleeping). For the first time, there was a chance I could make it a full year exclusively nursing. And then I got sick… really sick… I got mastitis (for the first time ever which even my doctor was surprised my first experience with this nasty infection was on my third kid) 3 times within 6-weeks. I considered quitting honestly because I was so miserable, but I was also determined and pushed through. After the fourth round of mastitis, my supply was dropping rapidly and Paisley was upset. I felt selfish, like I was forcing this dream to happen when my baby was unsatisfied. So we started formula and I came to peace with it.
And then Spencer… my fourth baby… I decided to have a thankful heart for whatever amount of time I got nursing him. I drank water, ate well, pumped when I could and he ate often. I didn’t get mastitis and my supply stayed strong. We made it past the time I had to stop with each of my daughters & I told myself every nursing session after that was a pure gift. Every eating transition he had (& teeth that came in.. if you know, you know) was new to me.
Towards the end of his first year, I did end up with mastitis 3 times. It was just like I had remembered it – extremely painful and debilitating. The last time Spencer was turning 11 months and I felt comfortable beginning to wean him. I did three little snack sessions a day (morning, lunch and bedtime), then two (morning and bedtime) then one (morning).
Our last nursing session was just after his first birthday. I specifically got him from his crib, cuddled in our rocking chair and nursed him one last time. When we were finishing up, I whispered, “I love you Spencer. Thank you for this gift!” and just like that, my dream of nursing my baby for one year came true.
So what was the difference? Ningxia. It’s a wolf berry juice that is incredibly healthy for you in all seasons of your life, but it is the only thing I didn’t have with the girls. I drank 2oz every day and I’m convinced it’s what helped support my supply.
You can learn more about Ningxia by clicking here and you can order some through this link.
Wherever you are on your journey with feeding your baby, it’s hard. It’s all hard. Regardless of your choice or requirement to feed via breast or bottle, being responsible for feeding your child is weighty. But I pray you are at pease and trust that God knows your heart and your baby’s needs. He sees you and will care for you and your child.